The Sea Behemoth
by Conservatoons
Summary: When Dale warns Hank about a monstrous sea creature, he thinks it's just nonsense. But after a childhood memory, he begins to get paranoid. Is the Sea Behemoth real?
1. A childhood memory

It was a nice day in Arlen. Bobby had come home from school, Peggy was playing boggle with her Asian and hick friends. And Dale, Bill, and Boomhaur were drinking beer by the fence.

Hank had to go do some errands. Tomorrow, him and Bobby were gonna go fishing, so he went to get some new equipment.

"So anyways, that's why I think our president is an alien." Dale said, finishing his long story about the government. Hank drove into the driveway, carrying fishing poles and bate, wearing his new bucket hat. He went home to put it up, and walked to his friends for a beer.

"Hank, what's with the fishing equipment?" Dale said, very suspicious.

"Oh, tomorrow, me and my boy Bobby are going fishing." Hank said, smiling.

Dale then paused and put out his cigarette.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Dale said. "Do you know what goes on in lakes around this time?"

Hank sighed, knowing it was gonna be another one of his stupid theories. "What Dale?"

"The Sea Behemoth!" Dale said, with his hands in the air. He caused Bill to drop his beer can.

"Dang it Dale, you scared me!"

"The what?" Hank said, acting confused.

"He's the demon of the sea!" Dale said, making Hank feel stupid. He then began his story about the creature.

"The Sea Behemoth has been spotted every 12 years by people. He lives deep in the lake." Dale said, with a serious tone in his voice.

"There have been many people who were linked to this monster. Some say they drowned, but I believe it was... Him."

"No one knows what he does to his victims. Some say he eats his victims. Some say he turns his victims into mermaids! But all I know is..." Dale paused, and stared into Hank's eyes, making him feel uncomfortable.

"Stay out of the lake!" He said, making Bill squeal with terror.

"Dang it Dale, that's just assinine." Hank said, pushing Dale away from him. "Me and my boy are going fishing, and there's not gonna be any "Sea Beast" after us!" Hank said, not even remembering the creature's name. He didn't even open his beer. Bill was depressed, with his head hanging low throughout this whole mess. He spilled his beer when Dale startled him.

Hank sighed. "Here Bill, you can have mine." He said, not really caring. Bill was suddenly happy, acting almost Bipolar. Hank marched into his house, thinking about his outrageous theory. But suddenly, his eyes were wide opened. A forgotten memory from his childhood had been remembered. He had a flashback about the time him and his friends went fishing.

"Hey guys, I think I got one!" A young Hank Hill said. Dale, Bill, and Boomhaur looked behind Hank's back, seeing what he had reeled in.

"I have him, I ha-... Ugh! He's pretty strong!... I can't... Reel him in!" Hank started to panic. He was no match for the fish. Dale, Bill, and Boomhaur were holding on to the fishing pole.

"Dang ol' Todd! We need your help!" Boomhaur said. On the the other end of the boat was a fat kid named Todd. He was much heavier than Bill, and obviously had the mass to reel in the fish.

"Help? You need my help?" Todd said, acting like a smart ass. "You have enough guys helping you there. You don't need my help!" Todd said.

"P-please! It's too strong!" Bill said, using all his strength. Todd took a fruit pie out of his pocket, and ignored them.

"Todd! Todd! Get your ass over here, we're losing him!" Hank said, as the fish got stronger. Todd took a bite into the strawberry pie. The gang could smell it from here, as it caused them to get distracted. Hank's nostrils were flaring. Just then, Hank, Dale, Bill, and Boomhaur were pulled out of the boat by the fish. It caused the entire boat to flip over, causing Todd to fall in with them. Hank was underwater. He tried searching for his friends. He saw Dale and Boomhaur. The three kids united and swam up, splashing their hands franticly to keep afloat.

"Wait a minute? Hank said. "Where's Bill?" The three began to panic. Bill was swimming underwater, trying to find Todd. He saw a trail of strawberry jelly. Todd was swimming away from something. But what? Bill had no way to follow him, since he was too far away. Bill swam up, and united with his friends.

"Bill, where were you, you son of a gun?" Hank said, concerned.

"I saw Todd swimming away from something. But he was too far away!" Bill said, as he started crying like a baby.

"Shut up Bill, we'll find him." Dale said. But they would soon realize that Todd was gone for good. No one knew what he was swimming away from, or what happened to him.

Fast-forward to the present. Hank, now a grown man, was beginning to get paranoid. Was the monster that Todd swam away from the "Sea Behemoth?" He was sitting down at the kitchen table, while Peggy was fixing her

"Spa-peggy and meatballs." Hank had this dumb, motionless look on his face.

"What's wrong Hank?" Said Peggy.

Hank was frozen.

"Hank... Ha-ank?" Peggy snapped her fingers in Hank's face.

"Uh.. Er, what?" Hank said, sounding stupid. Bobby walked into the kitchen, very excited for tomorrow's fishing trip. He sat next to Hank as Peggy put the food on the table.

"Hey dad!" Bobby said, startling hank. "So what time are we going tomorrow?"

"Um... How about 6:00 p.m?" Hank said. Peggy was chowing down on her food, when she paused and heard what he said.

"6:00 p.m? That's too late!" Peggy said. Hank wanted it to be late at night, since his childhood memory remembered that the event happened in the morning. He thought that maybe the creature was active early in the day.

"Well, um... I thought maybe we could go night fishing!" Hank said.

"Night fishing? That sound's awesome!" Bobby said. They finished their lunch and went back to their daily routine. Hank tried to ignore what Dale said, but then he realized that the events that took place in his childhood was exactly 36 years ago, today. Hank was paranoid as ever!


	2. Interrogating Bill

It was the middle of the night. Hank was tossing and turning, thinking about that poor fat kid they abandoned. He suddenly woke up, crying out "No!" Peggy woke up too.

"Hank! Shut up!" She said, acting cranky. Hank was sweating, with sleep in his eyes.

"Um, I… I forgot to walk Ladybird." Hank said, making up an excuse to go to Bill's house. Hank walked into the kitchen, putting a leash on Ladybird. He then walked outside and went over to his house.

"Bill!" Hank said, banging on the front door. No one answered. Bill was very careless, always having his door unlocked. Hank banged again and again, but no answer. That's when he decided to open the door himself. He entered in, and saw Bill sleeping in the living room, with the t.v on.

"Bill?" Hank said, walking toward the half-naked divorcee. "Bill!" Hank said once again, scaring him out of his sleep.

"Eh, eeh!... Uh, Hank? How'd you get in my house?" Bill said. Hank pushed his glasses up, pinching his nasal passages.

"Bill, your so dang careless!" He said. "But that's not what I'm here for." Bill got up, and was ready to hear what Hank had to say. Hank tied Ladybird to Bill's Kitchen table, with the loop around the leg of it. He turned off the t.v.

"Hey! I was watching th-" Hank looked at him, knowing that this was something more important than his programming. He began pacing back and forth in front of Bill, as if he was about to interrogate him. He then stopped.

"Bill… Do you remember that boy we used to play with?" He said, very seriously. Bill tried to remember. He and the gang used to play with a fifth friend all the time. He didn't know which kid he was talking about.

"Uh, could you describe him for me?" Bill said.

"He was a ginger. He was of Irish origin, and had a love of fruit pies." Hank said, as he described their long lost friend. When Hank said "fruit pies," it echoed throughout Bill's head. He knew who he was talking about. He remembered the smell of his last strawberry fruit pie. He understood why he never liked fruit pies from then on. Bill couldn't remember the kid's name.

"I remember him… But what was his name?" Bill said, almost in a trance. Hank stood in front of Bill and banged his fist against his table.

"Todd! His name was Todd O'Brien!" Hank said, scaring Bill once again. The name of the kid pierced through his ears, giving him chills down his back, causing his neck hair to stand up. Hank knew he had more information, which is why he came to him.

"Did you see anything when Todd swam away?" Hank said, who was definitely interrogating Bill at this point. Bill thought deep in his subconscious.

"I… I might have seen something…" Bill said. Hank got up and looked into Bill's eyes.

"What was it? Was it the fish we tried to catch?" Hank said. Bill began to get nervous, trying to remember what happened next. There was a silence in the room. Hank was getting furious.

"Well… I think I did see something chasing after him." Bill said. "It was a shadow of something. A "huge" shadow!" Bill got up and was wide awake. He knew much, much more.

"It seemed as if the fish was after his fruit pie. I'm pretty sure it was the same fish we were trying to reel in. Todd was most likely killed by the fish because of his own fruit pie. His obsession!" Bill finished, since that was all he knew.

"But… What about that thing Dale was telling us about?" Hank said. "Maybe the creature that was after Todd… was the Sea Behemoth!" Hank began talking like Dale.

"Uh… I don't know Hank..." Bill said, still in a half trance. Hank took Ladybird's leash and went to the door.

"Well, I better head home then. I'll figure it out tomorrow. Maybe Dale knows more." Hank said, leaving Bill. Hank went back home and went to bed.

"Hank, what the heck took you so long?" Peggy said, still cranky.

"Well Peg, she's an old dog, her bowels aren't as good as they used to be." Hank said.


	3. No, Not the Fruit Pie!

It was the next day, and Hank made sure to wake up early. He walked into the kitchen, seeing Ladybird's poo on the ground. He realized that he actually did forget to walk her. Bobby woke up later that morning to meet up with Joseph. He went over to Dale's house. Joseph opened the door.

"Hey Bobby, Wanna melt some legos?" Joseph said, acting like a pyromaniac.

"No, I was just wondering if you wanted to go fishing with me and my dad." Bobby said kindly. Dale was hearing the conversation, reading his newspaper. He heard Bobby say fishing, and jumped out of his recliner.

"Joseph!" Dale said, acting like an over-protective mother. He grabbed his son by the shoulders, dragging him away from the front door.

"Uh, how about you ask someone else?" Joseph said in a rush. Bobby raised his eyebrow in confusion. But he ignored it and went over to Connie's house, who was also busy. He saw Clark Peters walking by and decided to ask him. Clark was an obese kid with a blonde ponytail. He sounded congested all the time.

"Hey Clark, would you like to go fishing with me and my dad?" Bobby said. Clark didn't care, but since he never went fishing, he thought it might be fun.

"Sure, whatever." Clark said, not really caring. Meanwhile, Hank, Dale, Bill, and Boomhaur were drinking by the fence. Bill was a nervous wreck. He and Hank were the only two who had Todd on their minds.

"So anyways, I think the Sea Behemoth is a one of a kind. I think he is unbreedable." Dale said, making up a term for the beast.

"I found out that the creature was actually an eel that was mutated in the quarry and made its way to our lakes. It uses its fangs to inject its radiated nautical chemicals, causing its victims to mutate into a half man, half sea creature. A mermaid!" Dale finished, taking a sip of his beer. Bill began to get sick, and threw up in the cooler.

"Ew! Dang ol' man, dat's got-dang nasty Bill!" Boomhaur said, as him and Dale stepped back. Hank sighed.

"Dang it Bill, I just bought that beer!" Hank said. There was suddenly a moment of awkwardness.

"So anyways, your son Bobby wanted my son Joseph to join your fishing trip. I don't want him to have any part of your death!" Dale said.

"Shut up Dale! There's no such thing as a Sea Behemoth!" Hank said, correcting the monster's name this time. But Hank was in complete denial. He knew if he told Dale the truth, it would mean that he was wrong and Dale was right. Something that should never happen. Him and Bill kept it to themselves, and tried to forget this whole mess. It just didn't feel like something like this would happen in a peaceful town like Arlen. Hank drank his beer and went back home to get ready for the fishing trip. When he walked in, he saw Bobby with Clark peters in the living room.

"Hey dad, is it alright if I bring a friend over?" Bobby said. Hank examined the boy, disgusted by his hair.

"Uh, fine. He can come." Hank said. He walked into the room and grabbed the equipment, putting on his bucket hat. But all he can think of is Todd. Hank, Bobby, and Clark Peters went into the truck, driving away. They were on the road. Hank could see his friends by the fence on his rearview mirror. But then, he saw Dale running towards his car.

"Hank! Hank!" Dale cried out. Hank rolled down the window and stuck his head out.

"What is it Dale?" Hank responded.

"Don't forget about Todd!" Dale cried out again. Hank's eyes were bulging out. He was in shock. Dale remembered Todd all along.

"Who's Todd?" Bobby said, sitting in the passenger's seat.

"Bobby!" Hank said, acting as if Bobby said an inappropriate word. They were driving to the lake. The sun started to set, due to Hank's ridiculous time. The three guys pushed the boat into the water. Hank got into the boat first, while Bobby and Clark got in together. Hank turned on the engine, driving the boat to the middle of the lake. He had a heartbeat in his ears, knowing something felt wrong.

"Well, let's get going then." Hank said, as he was the first to attach bait to his hook. The three started to fish, as it began to get dark. Clark never fished before, and didn't know what to do. Plus, there were only 2 fishing rods. Bobby wasn't getting anything, so he decided to give it to Clark, and see if he could do better.

"Just throw the wire into the lake." Bobby said, teaching him. Clark gave it a try. He felt a tug, and reeled it up too fast, tearing the fish's mouth off.

"Dang it!" Clark said. "I lost the bait." There was no more bait left.

"Well, I guess we have to go home them." Hank said, as he was getting nervous. Clark digged into his pocket, holding something in his hand.

"Hey, maybe this will do." Clark said, revealing the item. Hank put up his fishing rod, catching nothing at all. He suddenly smelled a familiar stench. He turned around to see what was going on. What he saw in his hand was a piece of strawberry fruit pie! Clark attached the fruit pie to his fishing hook. And before Hank could stop him, he threw it into the water.

"Clark, no!" Hank cried out. Just seconds after throwing the fruit pie into the water, he felt a tug. A stronger tug than before.

"Hey! I got something!" Clark said.

"Ugh! He's a big one! I can't… I can't seem to reel him in!" Clark said, using all his strength. Hank grabbed Bobby by his sleeve and brought him over to the other end of the boat.

"Bobby! Stay away from him!" Hank said. Clark was no match for the fish. He was pulled out of the boat, driven deep into the lake. Bobby squealed in terror.

"We gotta get outta here!" Hank said, as he started the boat. They were driving away from the lake.

"Look dad! Something's after us!" Bobby said, pointing at a huge shadow following the boat.

"Bwaa!" Hank cried out, looking at how big it was. Suddenly, there was a bunch of bubbles coming out of the water. It created a huge wave, blowing the boat out of the water. Hank got out, grabbing Bobby by the arm. They ran to their car, not looking back. Hank and Bobby got in the car, gunning it. As they drove out of the forest, they felt a huge shadow over them. Bobby was getting anxiety farts.

"Dad! What's behind us?" Bobby said, panicking.

"Shut up Bobby! Don't look!" Hank cried out, freaking out for the first time in his life.

"RRRRAAAAAWWWRRRRRRR!" They heard an ear piercing scream behind them. It sounded like a dragon.


	4. Preparations

"Ow! Dad, my ears hurt!" Bobby cried out, as the creature continued to screamed again and again. Hank didn't hear Bobby, since it was so loud. Hank knew for sure this had to be the Sea Behemoth.

Meanwhile, Dale was in his basement, analyzing the pictures of the Sea Behemoth. He thought about the time they were kids. After Todd's disappearance, Bill told him that he saw a huge, long shadow, in the shape of an eel. He knew for sure that the creature who chased after Todd was the demon of the sea. He called Hank on his cell phone, telling him about his new discovery. But he didn't answer.

"Sug, I hear something outside!" Nancy said, looking out the window. The creature's scream could be heard throughout Arlen. Dale had a serious look on his face.

"He's coming…" Dale said to himself. "Nancy! Joseph! Get to the basement! It's an emergency!" Nancy and Joseph did what Dale said. He grabbed his shotgun under his bed and put on his orange exterminator outfit. Hank and Bobby managed to get out of the woods unharmed. Hank decided to look at what was making the noise. He saw a gigantic eel slowly rising from the sea. He was as long as Arlen, and as wide as the entire lake. It was a dark green color, due to the toxic waste. But it didn't seem to have a face. It had a slit across its head, looking like a giant closed eye. Bobby was covering his ears because of its screaming.

"Let's get the hell outta here Bobby!" Hank said, driving down the long road.

"Sug, I need to report this on the news! They're calling me! I need to leave the basement!" Nancy said.

"Mom! No!" Joseph cried out, worried about his mom. Dale was smoking 3 cigarettes, not caring about his health in this time of peril. He had his shotgun in his lap.

"Fine Nancy… But watch your back! You can borrow my gun." Dale handed the gun to Nancy.

"I don't need a gun sug; I just need to report this situation!" Nancy said, losing her patience. She left the basement. Joseph was crying his eyes out. "No mom! No!"

Nancy got in her car and drove away. Meanwhile, Hank called his wife Peggy to warn her about the monster. Peggy was playing boggle with Minh, until she started hearing the monster's screams. The phone rang and she picked it up.

"Hank! What's going on out there? I'm hearing this scream outside!" Peggy said. Minh ran out of Peggy's house to go home.

"Pe... The… A… Mon… G…. Out.. Of… Now!" Hank said, losing his signal on his phone. Peggy was confused, so she ignored it.

Hank turned around again, seeing the monster rising farther out of the lake. He was as tall as the Arlen water tower.

"Oh ma lord!" Hank cried out. Bobby was crying in the backseat.

"Don't worry Bobby, we're gonna make it." Hank said. "We're gonna make it." He said once again, but to himself.

Hank knew they had to get out of Arlen. Meanwhile, Nancy got into a helicopter and was transported to the sight. She couldn't believe that it was a gigantic sea creature, capable of destroying Arlen. She gave the details of the monster in her mic.

"THERE IS A GIANT CREATURE SPOTTED AT THE ARLEN LAKE! IT SEEMS TO BE WHAT'S CAUSING THE NOISE IN ARLEN!" She said, talking at the top of her lungs, because of the helicopter and the monster's scream. The cameramen took pictures and footage of the monster. Soon enough, it broadcasted all over t.v.

Meanwhile, the soupinousiphones were watching t.v, listening to the noise outside. Suddenly, their programming, as well as everyone in Arlen's programming, was interrupted by the breaking news. Listening to the news, Kahn was freaking out, as if he was off his medication.

"Minh! This is terrible! We need Kahn Jr. to grow up and become successful scholar!" Kahn said.

"Look Kahn, just because this creature is in Arlen, doesn't mean this is the end!" Minh said. Connie was watching them speak back and forth, getting nervous.

A lot of tension was beginning to grow upon Arlen. Not to mention closer…


	5. It's Todd!

The monster was now twice as tall as the Arlen tower.

"Dad! We need to go home and save mom!" Bobby said, breathing down Hank's neck.

"Bobby, I called her, she'll leave the house and drive away in her car." Hank said.

"But why can't we all get in the same car?" Bobby said. Suddenly, Hank remembered something very important.

"Oh ma lord!" Hank said. "Ladybird! Ladybird's back at home!" Hank accelerated, driving down Rainy Street. He drove into his front lawn, scraping the grass and leaving tire marks. He saw Peggy's car still parked.

"Why the hell is she still here? We got to get outta here!" Hank said, kicking the door down. Peggy screamed, thinking it was an intruder. Hank met up with Peggy.

"There's a giant monster in Arlen! I told you to get outta here!" Hank said. Peggy never turned on the t.v.

"Really? Well, let's get going then!" Peggy said. Bobby found Ladybird and brought her to Hank.

"Good job Bobby! Let's get outta here." Hank and Bobby ran to their car, putting Ladybird inside. Bobby got in the passenger's seat.

"Hank, what are you doing? I should be the one in the passenger's seat!" Peggy said. Hank's truck was too small to fit anyone else in the back seat.

"Drive your own car." Hank said, acting almost rude. Peggy was angry at what he said. Hank and Bobby drove out of their yard.

"Dad… Will mom make it out?" Bobby said. Hank looked into the rearview mirror, seeing an angry Peggy Hill.

"Eh, sure she will." Hank said, acting nonchalant. They quickly drove away, as the monster could be seen by everyone outside. Peggy took her eyes off Hank and saw the monster from afar. Meanwhile, Dale and Joseph were watching the Sea Behemoth outside. Dale examined it.

"Hmm…" Dale said. "The creature's face doesn't look like that of the Sea Behemoth."

"Dad… Are we gonna die?" Joseph said, grabbing his father by the sleeve. Mass hysteria was ravaging throughout Arlen. Everyone in town was watching the beast and listening to the news. The news helicopter lowered down on the road, waiting for the creature to do something. Nancy got out of the helicopter, and called Dale on her phone.

"Sug, it seems the creature stopped making noise. I think we're safe." Nancy said. Dale was still outside; beginning to think this wasn't the monster.

"That's fine, but I don't think this is the Sea Behemoth." Dale said. "It's far too big, and has a different face." Suddenly, the monster let out another roar, louder than its previous ones. Everyone looked at the beast, even Hank and Bobby, as they stopped their car and walked outside to see. The slit across the creature's face started to open slowly, revealing itself. After it opened, everyone was confused. But Hank, Dale, Bill, and Boomhaur knew who he was.

"No! It can't be!" Dale cried out.

"Eeh! Eeh! Eeeehh!" Bill cried out, screaming like a little girl.

"Dang ol' man, no! It can't be him!" Boomhaur cried out.

"Bwwwaaaaaaaaahhh!" Hank cried out, with the most epic bwah of all time.

"It can't be! No!" Hank cried.

"IT'S TODD!" He said, as he took Bobby and went back into the car. The chubby faced ginger looked happy for some reason, giggling in his 12 year old state. But everyone else was in horror, getting in their vehicles and driving away.

"Of course!" Dale said, pacing in his living room with a frighten Joseph on the couch. "The Sea Behemoth must have mutated Todd, turning him into a mermaid! So this is what the demon of the sea can do to people…" Bill went to his bathroom, crying and eating a bag of chips. He was a nervous wreck before, but this through him over the edge.

"Oh my lord! Sug, get me outta here!" Nancy said, talking to the man operating the helicopter. She was taken back to her home. Meanwhile, Peggy was freaking out. She got in her car, trying to start it with her car keys.

"Come… On… Hoya!" She said, as the car was able to start. But only briefly, as it was unfortunately running out of battery.

"No! No! Come on, start!" Peggy started crying, knowing she was done for. Todd began coming out of the lake, faster and faster.

"Minh! Don't you realize that this is the end?" Kahn said, acting crazy. Their whole house was destroyed because of Kahn's wrath. Tables and shelves flipped over, pots and windows smashed. The Soupinousiphones were never planned for this situation.

"Calm down! We need to get out of here!" Minh said. "And if we die, we'll be reincarnated." Kahn got furious.

"But what about the life we have now? Kahn Jr. needs to survive, even if we die!" Kahn grabbed Connie and brought her outside, putting her inside his van.

"Minh! Come on, let's get out of here!" Kahn cried out, as she was still in the house. She didn't answer.

"Minh?" Kahn said, trying to call her again. He got out of his van, trying to find his spouse. Right when he got out, Connie jumped into the front seat and closed the door, locking Kahn out of his own vehicle.

"Kahn Jr. what are you doing? Let me in!" Kahn said, as he was banging on the car door. Connie rolled down the window, sticking her head out.

"I'm tired of you two arguing!" Connie said. "And I don't want you controlling me! I'll do whatever I want in my life!" She drove out of the driveway, fueled by her hormones. Kahn chased after her.

"Connie! Kahn Jr. get over here right now!" Kahn cried out. She stuck her head out of the window again, giving him the peace sign, and sticking her tongue out.

"No! Come back!" Kahn said, losing the will to go on. Kahn tripped and fell right on his face.

"No! My daughter is gone!" He cried out to himself.


	6. Exile

As Todd got farther out of the lake, picking up a ton of speed, he covered up the moon, causing darkness to spread throughout Arlen. The news helicopter hovered over Dale's house, lowering onto their lawn. Nancy and the pilot got out, as Dale and Joseph greeted her.

"Mom! Your ok." Joseph said, hugging her. Nancy looked as if she wanted to be somewhere else.

"Um, Dale, this whole situation is giving me a headache." Nancy said, trying to make an excuse to go over

John Redcorn's trailer. "I need to have a healing session." Dale and Joseph looked at eachother in confusion. Why did she want to do this now? Before they could say anything to her, she went into her car and left.

"What do we do now dad?" Joseph said, looking concerned.

"We take this creature down…" Dale said, going back into his house. He went to his basement and grabbed a missal launcher. He went back outside and put his hand on Joseph's shoulder.

"Joseph, you need to get out of here." Dale said. He gave him the keys to his Winnebago and two walkie-talkies. "We'll keep in touch. But you have to leave Arlen. Now! I'm gonna take this monster down…" Joseph got in the Winnebago, while Dale got in the news helicopter.

"Bring me over to the beast!" Dale said, talking to the pilot. Connie was driving on a highway, confused and lost. She didn't know how to control a giant van. It was dark, and she couldn't see. She was banging her head against the steering wheel.

"I'm such an idiot!" Connie said. Meanwhile, Todd stopped once again, introducing himself to everyone.

"HELLO EVERYBODY! MY NAME IS TODD!" He said, in a deep and slow voice. Everyone in Arlen was screaming. The Mega-Lo-Mart was crowded. Anarchy ravaged throughout the town.

"Hey you! That's my toilet paper!" Buck Strickland said, as he punched Boomhaur in the face. Boomhaur was over at the Mega-Lo-Mart, trying to store up on food and items.

"Dang ol' man, dat's the last toilet paper dangit!" Boomhaur got up, with a bloody nose, and jumped on top of Strickland, biting his ear almost completely off. He took his toilet paper and put it in his cart. Boomhaur left the store, pushing the heavy cart across the parking lot. That is, until a truck collided into him, causing him to fly up in the air, face planting into the concrete.

"Agh! Dang ol' man, I can't get up!" Boomhaur said, dragging his body back to the store's entrance. He laid against the brick wall, looking at all of his groceries spilled across the floor. He saw his car straight ahead. Boomhaur needed to get out of here, but there were too many people. Hank and Bobby drove over at Strickland Propane.

"What are we doing here dad?" Bobby said.

"We're saving Strickland propane." Hank said. Hank got Ladybird out, and the three went to the back. Hank grabbed several propane tanks and put it in their company's truck. He took his shirt off.

"Bobby, don't look!" Hank said, since he didn't want Bobby seeing him half naked. Bobby put his hands over his eyes. Hank wrapped his shirt over his fist and punched through the truck's glass, unlocking it from the inside. He put his shirt back on.

"Alright Bobby, you can look now." Hank said. Bobby put Ladybird in the back, and got into the passenger's seat. Hank got in the driver's seat.

"But dad, there's no key to drive the truck." Bobby said. Hank pulled out a fishing hook he kept in his pocket.

"Hmm, maybe I can start the truck using this hook." Hank said. I took several tries, but he managed to start the car off.

"Wow dad, you're cool!" Bobby said, thinking about him as some kind of action hero. Meanwhile, Connie gave up and Left his father's van. She decided to hitchhike. She lucked out and saw Joseph driving down the highway.

"Connie?" Joseph said. He opened the door so she can get in.

"What are you doing?" Said Joseph

"I'm sick of my parents, so I left them by hijacking their vehicle." Connie said. "But I got lost and decided to hitchhike."

"Well, with my dad's gps, I'm able to get out of Arlen." Joseph said. Connie smacked her forehead.

"My dad had a gps too! Stupid, stupid me!" Connie said, always beating herself up.

"Dad, where are you?" Joseph said, talking into his Walkie-Talkie.

"I'm almost near Todd-I mean the creature!" Dale said, correcting himself.

"Well, It might take me some hours getting out of Arlen. But be careful dad! And make sure find mom after your done." Joseph said. Dale had the perfect opportunity to kill Todd. He had stopped pulling himself out of the water. The helicopter hovered over to Todd's giant, pudgy face. Dale pointed his missal launcher at his eye.

"Goodbye Todd..." Dale said. He fired the missal towards his eye. But suddenly, Todd moved his head, aligning his mouth with the missal.

"NUM!" Todd said, swallowing the missal.

"No! He ate it! Get me outta here!" Dale said, as the helicopter flew away. Todd was unstoppable. All they could do now is leave Arlen.

"MMM... NOW, LET'S GET BACK TO WORK!" Todd said to himself. He began pulling out of the lake for the third time. This time he was faster than ever. He was almost halfway to belly flopping on Arlen. Meanwhile, Peggy knew she was done for. She spent her final hours playing boggle. She shook the letters up like never before.

"Come... On... Hoya!" Peggy said, finished shaking up the letters. She examined the words.

"Let's see here." Peggy said. "Die... Dead... Killed... Deceased.." She began to get angry at the ironic words.

"I can't believe we lost our daughter." Kahn said. He was angry that Minh didn't leave the house in time.

"Look Kahn, she might have left us, but atleast she's surviving." Minh said. Connie and Joseph were driving across a long road. There was a narrow bridge ahead. Joseph started to panic.

"Oh man! It's a bridge! What if we fall off?" Joseph said, as his hormonal mood swings got the best of him. Connie was no help either, since she was also stressed out.

"Just chill dude! Let me have the steering wheel!" Connie said, grabbing the wheel.

"No! Your gonna break it!" Joseph said. They fought over the steering. When they got on the bridge, Connie pushed Joseph off his seat, while he was still holding on. The Winnebago turned to the far left, falling off the bridge. It was a river. They drifted away, having no control of the vehicle.

"Dang it Joseph, your such an idiot! You should've let me drive!" Connie said. The two yelled back and forth, as they entered a tunnel, unable to see anything. They hit a rock, preventing the vehicle to move any further. Arlen was an hour away from destruction.


	7. Ending

Boomhaur limped to his car. He drove out of the parking lot. But there was alot of traffic going on, and by the look of Todd, he knew he was a goner.

"Aw man, dang o' why? Why?" Boomhaur said, crying in his car. He got out and ran like never before. His whole life was flashing before his eyes. He kept running and never stopped. He thought about how he never married anyone, and wasted his life chasing after girls. Boomhaur ran through the streets. He accidently fell through a manhole and landed in a sewer, drowning. Meanwhile, Todd was halfway out of the water. It would be about an hour until he landed on Arlen. Dale went over to John Redcorn's house to find Nancy. The helicopter landed and Dale got out.

"Nancy! It's me, Dale!" Dale said. He heard whispering behind the door. After about 5 minutes, Nancy opened the door.

"Sorry to interrupt your healing session, but we need to out of here. The monster's gonna destroy Arlen!" Dale said. Nancy just stood there, until a shirtless John Redcorn walked behind her.

"John Redcorn? Where's your vest?" Dale said. Redcorn forgot to put on his vest. He paused for a second and passed through Nancy.

"She's mine, Dale!" Redcorn said, as he jumped on Dale, pounding his face in. Nancy freaked out, and ran back inside. She grabbed a tomahawk.

"Nancy! Help me!" Dale cried out, with a broken nose. Nancy ran back outside and held the Tomahawk like a dagger. She had to make the ultimate sacrifice. She had to kill John Redcorn to save her husband. But because she wasn't strong enough, she only stabbed him halfway.

"Agh!" Redcorn cried out. "What are you doing, Nancy?" Redcorn got up. Dale did an epic sweep kick which caused Redcorn to fall and hit his head. He was unconscious. The pilot abandoned Dale and Nancy, trying to save himself.

"How dare you betray me! Curse you!" Dale cried out, shaking his fist in the air.

"Sug, we can just use John Redcorn's jeep." Nancy said. Dale took Redcorn's car keys from his pocket and the two got in his jeep. The two drove away in spectacular fashion, listening to Freewheel Burning by Judas Priest. Meanwhile, Joseph was trying to contact his father, but Dale left his Walkie-Talkie in the helicopter.

"Come on dad, pick up!" Joseph said, with tears in his eyes. The pilot controlling the helicopter heard Joseph, but ignored it. He threw it out of the helicopter.

"Why isn't he responding?" Joseph said, talking to Connie.

"I don't care! We just need to get out of here!" Connie said. She opened the right car door, since the other one was against the tunnel's wall.

"Connie, I wouldn't do that if I were you... The river's too fast." Joseph said. Connie stuck her tongue out at Joseph in rebellion. She slowly lowered her right foot into the water.

"Connie... Don't do it!" Joseph said. She ignored him and jumped into the water. Immediately, she was shot out through the tunnel and traveled through the river. She finally met her end when she collided into a rock.

"Connie!" Joseph cried out. He went over to the back of the Winnebago and grabbed a pack of Dale's cigarettes. He thought that since smoking calmed his father down, it could work on him. He found a lighter and tried to light it.

"Come on... Come on..." Unfortunately, He was too close to Dale's pestiside. Joseph was able to light it up. After a few puffs, a piece fell off and rolled towards the flammable tank.

"Nooooo!" Joseph cried out. But it was too late. The vehicle blew up, destroying the tunnel.

"Dad... Are we almost there..." Bobby said, tired from the long drive.

"Just a couple miles left..." Hank said. Todd was about to leave the water. He would soon belly flop on Arlen, killing hundrends of Arlenians.

"I'M ALMOST OUT!" Todd said, warning everyone in Arlen. Bill was still in the bathroom, sleeping in his filthy tub. He heard someone banging on the door. It was Kahn. He walked over to the front door and opened it.

"Hello?" Bill said. Kahn hit him over the head with a bat. Knocking him out cold.

"Come on Minh! Fat redneck has beer!" Kahn said. They decided to spend their last hour drunk. The two went back home and decided to party since their lives were over. Meanwhile, Dale and Nancy were driving in John Redcorn's jeep.

"Dale, where's Joseph?" Nancy said. Dale realized he left his Walkie-Talkie in the helicopter. But he still Knew how to track down his Winnebago.

"I bugged my vehicle, using this device." Dale said, as he pulled out a gps-looking device. "Since Joseph took my vehicle, we can track him down with this.

"But sug, the monster looks like its about to jump." Nancy said.

"We'll get out of here somehow..." Dale said, looking at the monster in his rearview mirror. Arlen was about 45 minutes away from destruction. Dale and Nancy were not far from Joseph. They stopped at the bridge where Joseph and Connie were at.

"Hmm... It seems they're located in some kind of tunnel."Dale said. They crossed the bridge and drove by the river.

"Sug! I think I see the tunnel... But it's in flames!" Nancy cried out. They drove over to the tunnel, and saw the destroyed remains of it. Dale covered his mouth and screamed in horror.

"Joseph! No!" Nancy cried out. The miltary got involved with the monster. Jets flew by and shot at him, but Todd was unstoppable. They shot several missals at him, but Todd ate it.

"I'M GONNA BURP!" Todd cried out. The jets flew away from his counter attack. Todd burped the missals out in flames, destroying them all. With 30 minutes remaining, Arlen was total anarchy. Luanne and Lucky were stuck in traffic. Bug and Juan padro, Dale's queer parents, got their trailer stuck in a pothole. And Dale and Nancy accepted their fate. Meanwhile, Hank and Bobby were on a long road. It was gonna take them about 30 minutes to get there.

"We're gonna make it Bobby!" Hank said. They were going to survive.

"BEEEELLLLLLLYYYYYY FFFLLLOOOOOOOP!" Todd cried out. His butt got out of the water. He was in the air for about 30 seconds. His torso hit Arlen's tallest building, causing it to explode. He hit several electrical outlets, shutting off most Arlen's power. Peggy was playing her last Boggle, until the electricity went out.

Her last words were "Aawwww... Dang!" Todd finally hit the ground, creating a huge blast of wind. It Blew away most of Arlen's neighborhoods. 1/3 of Arlen was destroyed. Todd giggled as he rolled around the wreckage, flattening places he didn't destroy. He hit the Arlen water tower, as it fell and destroyed even more places. He looked across the town, seeing if there were any survivors. That's when he saw Hank and Bobby driving away. He moved towards them like an inch worm. Bobby looked out the window, seeing the angry monster.

"Dad! The monster's after us!" Bobby cried out. Hank saw Todd from behind.

"So Todd... We meet again..." Hank said, as if he was in an action movie. Todd was moving fast. He was on the same trail as Hank and Bobby. Hank saw the sign "You are now leaving Arlen." He was almost there, but Todd was gaining on them.

"What are we gonna do dad?" Bobby said. Hank thought hard. He had about 10 propane tanks in the back, but knew it wouldn't be enough to finish off Todd. Just then, he realized something.

"Bobby!" Hank cried out. "Do you have anything in your pocket?" Bobby checked all his pockets, having nothing inside them.

"Sorry dad." Bobby said. He noticed a red stain on his shirt. Hank didn't hesitate to ask what it was.

"Bobby, give me your shirt!" Hank said, as the monster was right behind them. Bobby took his shirt off. Hank sniffed the stain. It smelled like strawberries.

"Bobby, did you have some of Clark's fruit pie?" Hank said.

"Uh huh." Bobby said. Hank stopped the truck, just yards away from leaving Arlen. He got out, holding the strawberry stained shirt.

"Todd! Todd!" Hank cried out. "Stop!" Todd saw Him, and stopped inches away from him. He sniffed the shirt.

"FRUIT PIE?" Todd said.

"Todd, if I give you this shirt, will you please leave Arlen?" Hank cried out, so he can hear. There was a moment of silence. Todd sniffed the shirt once again.

"HHHMMMM... OK, I'LL STOP!" Todd said, as he ate the shirt and left for the lake. That is, until the military captured him. Hank couldn't believe that actually worked. He went back to the truck and drove away, until he stopped by the sign. Hank and Bobby got out. They went to the other side of the sign saying "Now entering Arlen."

"Hehehe." Hank chuckled. "Get it Bobby? There's no more Arlen. Hahaha!"

(I know that was out of character for Hank, but it was too funny.)

THE END


End file.
